Occult
Unspeakable Name Mispronunciation
4.7 stars20,834 reviews
Every attempt at a forbidden name comes out confidently, loudly, and wrong.
- Rarity
- Rare
- Severity
- Linguistic
- Success Rate
- 93% Incorrect
- Manifestations remaining
- 1,061
Product details
Every attempt at a forbidden name comes out confidently, loudly, and wrong.
- Classified as a Rare Occult filing.
- Non-harmful / non-permanent inconvenience only.
- Confirmed by Bureau inspectors before fulfillment.
Manufacturer
Blackthorn Laboratories
Precision-engineered inconveniences since 1694.
A premium research concern specializing in repeatable, peer-reviewed misfortune.
- Founded
- 1694
- Headquarters
- Salem, MA
- Known for
- Technology-related inconveniences
- Warranty
- Lifetime annoyance guarantee
Side effects
May cause ancient syllables to sound like discount furniture.
Filed reviews
Showing selected excerpts from 20,834 filed reviews.
5/5 stamped formsVerified Hex Owner
“Unspeakable Name Mispronunciation performed exactly as filed. The supernatural element was tasteful, inconvenient, and oddly well-lit.”
4/5 stamped formsVerified Hex Owner
“Looked like a stock photo until Unspeakable Name Mispronunciation made the room feel personally selected by an ancient nuisance.”
5/5 stamped formsVerified Hex Owner
“Excellent gift energy. Unspeakable Name Mispronunciation landed somewhere between mildly haunted and extremely retail.”
Specifications
- Rarity
- Rare
- Severity
- Linguistic
- Success rate
- 93% Incorrect
- Delivery estimate
- Arrives in 3-5 business hauntings
Arcane compliance filing
- Certification authority
- Bureau of Arcane Commerce
- License number
- BAC-OCC-RAR-TION
- Approved inconvenience class
- Occult / Rare
- Filing jurisdiction
- Domestic and workplace environments
- Last inspection date
- Most recent quarterly filing
- Known side effects
- May cause ancient syllables to sound like discount furniture.
